Im ok
Please play the above whilst reading this, there will be another song above too please listen to that one as well..
How many times are you asked if you are ok during the day, how many times do you answer yes im fine thanks. Its like when you goto the doctors, first thing they ask is how are you, which we reply Im ok...erm then why are you here?
How comes when anyone starts talking about music, there is a host of stuff that you immediately want to listen too. How come its stuff that often provokes memories and feelings that you would rather forget. For example, pet shop boys, its a sin. I remember haing that on a 12 inch, it was the days I had fantasies about living in a caravan with george micheal and cliff richard, by the sea...ok ok I was a very unhappy kid, hmmmm wonder if thats why im single now, my choice in chaps!!!! Anyway I can remember sitting in the front room one sunday playing it over and over again, never getting bored with it, closing my eyes, singing along, completely lost and singing out so loudly I thought my lungs would burst, until of course being told to switch it off, its the bubble bursting that hurts.
Now this loosing myself in music has always continued, I can just find that place, that place where you are just there with the music and everything else has gone, you are sur-rounded by nothingness, emptiness, just you and the tune. Nothing else can get in. When its really crap but a tune on, headphones on and turn it up until it feels like your ears are going to bleed, the music chases all the crap out, all the stuff you dont want to think about, it takes it all away for at least a glorious 2 minutes, then just start it up again.
Oh I dont know. How comes life feels like one big maze and you cant find the middle, or your way out?
Anyway Godley and Creme, had them on 12 inch too, its such a tune it really is. I think what I need to do is get all my memory tracks and make new ones for them. Not just ones that ive put on to escape from reality.
Well Air supply, used to have this on the juke box at a pub I worked in when I was 16, oh god I can nearly remember what all the tunes were on that thing. Such a weird time in my life too. Its a great break up track too! Real put your head in the pillow and weep like a bairn...
I cant be sad though really, after all I'm ok..........
4 comments:
Know the feeling. Many songs and some entire albums have been spoiled for me because my mood has imprinted on the music. Certain songs bring back unbearably realistic memories- not just remembering the event but the smells, sounds, and emotions that accompanied it. Bleh. Nice hog pics from the other day. :D
Nic, I really don't know what to say. I love the music though and do understand what you mean about bringing back memories.
I have several songs that I can't even play anymore, because I don't want to end up in floods of tears. Not because they were our tune" because we didn't really have any, my ex's taste in music was entirely different to mine. It's the lyrics, I tend to like ballads best, full of sloppy, break-up, heartbroken stuff. Must be a masochist. There's a few tunes that bring back happy memories though, but then I still end up fed up, because those times are long past. To be honest, that's why I don't often listen to music. Hurts too much in the end either way. Miserable old cow I am.
When I saw this video, I had a feeling that I had seen it before. Then I remembered, it was on Beavis and Butthead! And at the end they kept thinking it was over, but it wasnt... was pretty funny.
Hope youre feeling better. *hug*
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